Category: Coaching

To Lead or Not To Lead – What Would Shakespeare Say?

by Anne-Maria Yritys, posted in Authentic Leadership, Coaching
 “Some are born great, some achieve greatness, and some have greatness thrust upon them”.

(William Shakespeare)

 What could Shakespeare, as a poet and actor, possibly have known about leadership? After all, he was “only” the greatest writer in English language of all times, a man who made history with his dramas and plays, many of which still today serve and entertain mankind in many parts of the world. If he sat down with me on my sofa right now, I would definitely be interested in hearing his life story – but, it is too late, because he passed away almost 400 years ago. And still, the memory of him is with us, because he was a leader of his own kind – someone, who managed to make history through his original and tireless work. 

Leadership, as any other activity, is continuous and tireless work. Anyone with leadership experience knows this. Not only do you have to take care of, and nurture, yourself, but also your team. Leadership requires a lot, and not many people dare to accept a leadership role – due to the fact that leadership can be very demanding. For example in Finland, most people prefer specialist roles rather than taking upon them the “burden” of being a leader. Why? Well, the reasons could be many, including the fact that at least in Finland; a leader does not always get paid much better than an average employee. This, of course, depends upon the company, and the leadership role in question. 

 

1. Emotional Stability, and Maturity

As a leader, you need to be emotionally stable. Of course, leaders can and should have feelings too – but as a leader, you need to be aware of the responsibility you have, and act accordingly. Emotional stability and maturity is not always equal to the age of the person – this of course depends upon the type of leadership role. Although sometimes, even very young people are capable of taking very heavy responsibilities. It all depends upon circumstances, and the leadership role in question. Personally I led my first team at the age of 25. In some cultures, even royalties and kings can be even younger. Any leader can experience a private (or professional) crisis, which is why leaders should be taken care of very well too. 

2. A Willingness to Lead.

Leaders are born, natural, and developed. Some people just have more “in-born” leadership qualities, such as great social and people skills. We all know that good leaders need to have good people skills – and if not, these have to be developed. Some people are more eager and willing to lead than others – so why not give the willing ones the chance? There is no way of forcing those who are not willing, and at the same time you need to evaluate why a specific person wants to take upon them an extra amount of responsibility and lead, in addition to themselves, others too. It is easier to train willing leaders than forcing employees into leadership roles who clearly do not want it in the first place.

 

3. A Willingness To Serve, and To Help Others.

A leader´s role is manifold, and there are many kinds of expectations in regard with leaders. A leader needs to be supportive, helpful, a good listener, a teacher, empathetic or at least sympathetic, and in addition to all the soft skills needed, a leader also needs to be capable of setting boundaries, being determined, treat every employee equally – and these people skills, most often, in addition to all technical skills required. A leader should never behave poorly. The requirements are strict, although we all are human. 


4. Flexibility.

 
 A leader needs to be flexible. Very often, leadership roles require various kinds of expansive activities. A leader needs to be prepared for unplanned activities. As much as we would like them to, things do not often go as planned. This, of course, depends upon the type of industry and business activity, but all industries require an amount of flexibility. As a leader you also have to realize, and accept, that very often your staff does have more expertise than you. A leader is not always the smartest one – but rather the one leading a team of highly qualified professionals.


“You are water; water is you. Think about the mysterious magical nature of this liquid energy that we take for granted. Try to squeeze it, and it eludes us; relax our hands into it, and we experience it readily. If it stays stationary, it will become stagnant; if it is allowed to flow, it will stay pure. It does not seek the high spots to be above it all, but settles for the lowest places. It gathers into rivers, lakes, and streams; courses to the sea; and then evaporates to fall again as rain. It maps out nothing and it plays no favorites: It doesn’t intend to provide sustenance to the animals and plants. It has no plans to irrigate the fields; to slake our thirst; or to provide the opportunity to swim, sail, ski, and scuba dive. These are some of the benefits that come naturally from water simply doing what it does and being what it is”. (Dr. Wayne W. Dyer).

Leadership is a responsible activity, and should not be taken lightheartedly. This does not mean that you have to be dead-serious – on the contrary! Leadership requires a lot, especially having good people and self-management skills. A good sense of humor is not of harm either. 

Valuation of Time

by Anne-Maria Yritys, posted in Change Management, Coaching, Time Management

“Time is the coin of your life. It is the only coin you have, and only you can determine how it will be spent. Be careful lest you let other people spend it for you”. 

(Carl Sandburg)

 
(Hourglass. Artist: coward_lion. Freedigitalphotos.net. Published on 05 September 2012).
 
What does your average day look like? How do you fill your hours? 
If you do not know how, try to become more aware of it by keeping a daily journal. You can do it as a temporary endeavor just in order to increase your personal awareness about how, and on what kind of things, you actually spend your precious time. 
 
 
Time is our friend, if we let it be. Time can also be our enemy, in case we are not well enough focused upon involving people and things in our lives that really matter to us, and make a difference. When keeping a daily journal you will soon become aware of what kind of things take up your time. Divide those things into categories according to positive and negative time (and energy) consumers. I bet you will be surprised at how much of your daily, and weekly, time goes wasted upon things (and even people) of no relevance. Things (and people) that are meaningless, rather consuming your energy than helping you achieve your goals. 
 
 
I am not saying that we should ignore people, be cold-hearted or anything alike. The fact may just be that you are spending too much thoughts, efforts, and energy on people and circumstances that do not serve your life purpose. People, who want to rob you of your time without having space for you in their lives, or in their affairs. This is especially true if you are a giver by nature, rather than a taker. It is not always possible to know beforehand what is useful, and what only consumes your time without giving you anything in return. A good way of estimating whether something/someone is worth your time is to observe behavior (in regards to people) and concrete results (in regards to things). People who value you will not waste your time, or your energy. They will respect you, and stick to their promises. 
 
 
Tips for increasing your valuation of time, and making your days more effective: 
 
– Keep a daily journal. Yes, daily, not only on a weekly basis. The better you realize how you actually spend your days, the easier it gets to make important changes, and adjustments. 
– As soon as you notice which things (and people) consume too much of your energy, focus on diminishing their influence in your life. 
– If you are a giver by nature (hopefully), keep on giving. But do not let people and/or circumstances take advantage of you. 
– Be prepared to cut down on energy- and time consumers such as TV as well. If you spend three hours per day on watching TV, start by reducing it to two hours, and fill the gap with something else, like reading an interesting book, or an (extra) hour of exercise. 
– Cut down on unnecessary social media usage, and unnecessary e-mails. Only subscribe to pages that truly serve you, and unsubscribe from newsletters that do not. I can tell from personal experiences how much time we spend on useless e-mails, reading spam and all the like filling our digital mail boxes every day. 
– If you haven´t earlier, start respecting your time NOW. It is not too late. 
– Remember also to respect other people´s time. 
– Stop being too nice. If you have something scheduled, and your counterpart does not show up, or shows up too late without even apologizing, it is a bad sign. People and circumstances that do not value your time are not worth your time. 
– If you still, despite of integrating these tips into your daily life, have trouble with time wasters: consider hiring a coach who is helping you. However, be careful when selecting a coach and make sure that your coach is someone who values your time, and is worthy of it. 
 
 
Good luck!
 
 
(Deadline Calender Means Target And Due Date. Artist: Stuart Miles. Freedigitalphotos.net. Published on 13 May 2014).

 

Lead Change or Change Will Lead You

by Anne-Maria Yritys, posted in Change Management, Coaching

“For the past 33 years, I have looked in the mirror every morning and asked myself: ‘If today were the last day of my life, would I want to do what I am about to do today?’ Whenever the answer has been ‘No’ for too many days in a row, I know I need to change something”.

(Steve Jobs)
 

 

 

 

Change Same Buttons Shows Changing Or Improvement. Artist: Stuart Miles. Freedigitalphotos.net. Published on 09 October 2013.
Steve Jobs was a wise man who died too young. Yet, during his short life, he drove and achieved an amount of change that many of us only dream of – although, each and one of us possess the capability of being catalysts and active agents of change. Our circumstances are different, but it is not about background who becomes a successful catalyst for change and who not. As a matter of fact, those who are determined to achieve will do so, no matter how difficult circumstances sometimes may be. 
 
 
Driving change is always individual. Driving change, and being a change agent is not about status or title, not even about material possessions. Change is continuous, and leads to evolution. Very often change management is referred to as change projects in IT, but change management is much more than that. Change management includes the capability of driving and leading change in one´s personal life as well. We are all affected by changes in society, driven by other individuals (change agents). Some changes are impossible to avoid, so adaptation and going with the flow is often necessary in order to stay well-integrated. 
 
However, there are many things we can influence on a personal level. 
 
 
 
“Be the change you want to see in the world”. 
(Mahatma Gandhi)
 
 
 
Advice for leading change in your life: 
 
– Always embrace change, and see it as something positive. Change often brings new possibilities. 
– Remember to rest, but also keep on moving. When life becomes too comfortable, there is a need for development and growth. 
– Be proactive. It is far better to have the ability to influence change than being hit by sudden, even radical change, when it is already too late to have a say in the course of happenings. 
– Make a long-term plan for your life, at least for the upcoming five years. Include both business and private life in your plan. Where do you want to be in five years? What do you want to achieve? How will you achieve it? 
– You can have several different plans: one for business life, one for your private life. If you have a long-term plan (say, for the next five years), divide your long-term plan into shorter time periods (e.g. the coming year 2015, for the coming quarter, a weekly schedule, and a daily schedule). Leave some space for adjustments as well, and for non-planned time (otherwise, life can become too boring).
 
Why is it so important to make plans, have goals, and lead change? 
 
If YOU do not take responsibility for your life, and make plans, you will either end up achieving nothing, or someone else making the plans for your life. Which do you prefer? Being guided/directed, or proactively leading your life into your desired direction? 
 
Leading change is important for everyone, not only for those with a professional designation for being change agents/leaders/managers. 
 
Change can sometimes feel uncomfortable, but the more you step out of your comfort zone, and develop your ability to live with constant, small changes, the better you will feel in the long run. It is far better to be proactive and lead small changes on a regular basis, than wait for something to happen (and the more you procrastinate, the more effort will you have to give at a later stage). 
 
 
 
“Change can be scary, but what is even scarier? Allowing fear to stop you from growing, evolving, and progressing”. 
(Mandy Hale)
 
 
 
 
(Time For Change Shows Revise Changing And Difference. Artist: Stuart Miles. Freedigitalphotos.net. Published on 15 September 2014).

What Really Makes People Successful

by Anne-Maria Yritys, posted in Coaching, Success

There are countless articles, and books, available upon success and different kinds of success stories. We have all seen people succeed, in different kinds of settings.  All successful people, including their stories, share a number of common factors.  

One of the most important factors in succeeding is taking action. Yes. Successful people are active. Active does not equal to running around like a headless chicken. Successful people take action instead of just thinking about it. Say, for example, that you want to learn how to speak Chinese fluently (just like Mark Zuckerberg). What do you do? You take action. There are many ways of learning a new language, but it definitely always requires taking action. Mastering a language requires learning, practicing, and using the language. Or, if you want to write a book – the book won´t finish by itself. You need to take action, and start writing. Of course writing a book is much more than just writing – you need to be well-organized, capable of planning a writing process, having a common thread in order to create a good story. In addition, you need to understand something about marketing, and commercializing your book (unless you are writing a book only for yourself). Of course, if you do not have any marketing skills, you may need some help with it. Activity is the key word. No action = no results.

This leads us to the next quality of someone very successful.

FOCUS. Successful people are well focused, and they know how to focus. We all know how important it is for athletes to focus on their performance e.g. before an important competition. Well, actually athletes need to focus at all times, since they are training a lot – and they need to live accordingly, including what they consume, how they sleep, who they spend time with. 

And yes, here we come to the next point: Successful people choose how they spend their time, and with whom. Of course we cannot always choose who we work with etc., but basically there is a possibility of selecting who we spend time with when not working. Or, choosing who we work with if we are self-employed, or running our own business. In fact, we become like the closest people to us, and those we spend most time with. This is also one reason for why people often go apart when the other person starts changing to an extent that no longer allows them to continue on the same “level”. Unless the other person can adjust to that, and there is simultaneous growth in both. In this sense, weak links are often regarded more important for example in job search. Although friends and family may help us find new possibilities, they very often do not want us to change, to move, or to become different from what we are today. 

Succeeding also requires being capable of stepping out of one´s comfort zone. I constantly read about people´s problems stepping out of the comfort zone, behind which often is fear (of change). In fact, just last week I read somewhere that only 2 % of all people regularly step out of their comfort zone. The rest likes to enjoy the status quo, due to various reasons. Of course we are all different, but stretching one´s limits every now and then is not harmful. An interesting article, “6 Ways Pushing Past Your Comfort Zone Is Critical to Success”, was published in Forbes earlier this year (Caprino, K. 21.5.2014). 

Having confidence in one self is also extremely important in succeeding. If no one else believes in you, or cheers you up, you need to be your own best friend, motivator, success coach. In fact, motivation starts from within us. It can only be triggered by someone else, e.g. through inspiration and support. But we need to confide in ourselves in order to succeed. Other people may, in fact, sometimes show feelings of fear towards our success, which makes it even more important to be able to stay strong even in tough times. If you truly want to succeed, you won´t let criticism, jealousy or other fearful actions let you down. Constructive criticism is always at place, but if someone constantly criticizes you it may be because they are fearful of something. Don´t let anyone turn you down. If you don´t have a personal (success) coach – make sure to be the cheerleader of you own life, and career.  

Productivity is something all successful people possess, which relates back to being capable of taking action. Successful people do not hesitate – they take action – and they produce. Productivity usually increases with experience, but if you are successful in creating something new (think about Albert Einstein for example, or Thomas Edison), it often takes more trials and errors before the actual breakthrough. You just need to keep going, and trying.

Embracing failure. Admitted – none of us enjoys failure, but it is a crucial part of success. If you give up after every single failure, you are not succeeding. Being willing to succeed requires the ability of embracing failures as well. Failure makes us develop and grow. When we fail, we learn from it, and try even harder, or in a different way, after failing. 

Success also demands the capability of long-term planning. If you want to succeed, you need to be able to plan ahead, let´s say for the next five years ahead. Start by estimating where you want to be in five years, and then make a plan for how to get there. Just remember – always plan with room for adjustments, and possible drawbacks.

Finally: Other people do not always need to understand you. Those who need to understand will do so, and the rest does not matter. What matters is you understanding yourself.

“The size of your success is measured by the strength of your desire; the size of your dream; and how you handle disappointment along the way”.

Robert Kiyosaki