Category: Life Coaching

Virtues and Sins part V: Humilitas vs. Superbia

by Anne-Maria Yritys, posted in Authentic Leadership, Business Ethics, Change Management, Life Coaching, Virtues and Sins

“Pride makes us artificial, and humility makes us real”. (Thomas Merton)

It is ok to ask for help. True strength comes from the ability to admit ones weaknesses. According to the article “Interpersonal relations and group processes – Alone in the Crowd: The Structure and Spread of Loneliness in a Large Social Network” in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology Cacioppo, J.T., Fowler, J.H., and Christiakis, N.A. 2009, Vol. 97, No. 6, 977-991, the discrepancy between an individual´s loneliness and the number of connections in a social network is well documented, yet little is known about the placement of loneliness within, or the spread of loneliness through, social networks.

Valtonen, J. (2011, Psykologia. Quoted 12.3.2014) states that loneliness weakens the immune system and increases the risk of cardiovascular diseases, Alzheimer and mental illness. It is also contagious.

Valtonen writes: An American student, Kendall Palladino, traveled to Kolkata in order to work with Mother Teresa who he admired. Kendall insisted that he´d study to become a doctor as soon as he had graduated a priest in order to take care of leprosy patients in developing countries. Mother Teresa did not understand why. “Your home country is infected by the leprosy of the West”, Mother Teresa said, and continued: “Poverty and suffering much worse than in Kolkata”.

What Mother Teresa meant was loneliness. Palladino, later on, revealed publically that the appointment changed his life. He abandoned his dream about medical studies, and works today in the United States with terminal care patients, helping sick and lonely people.

Often we cannot see the wood for the trees.

“There is nothing noble in being superior to your fellow-man; true nobility is being superior to your former self.” (Ernest Hemingway)

Virtues and Sins Part IV: Diligence vs. Sloth

by Anne-Maria Yritys, posted in Authentic Leadership, Business Ethics, Change Management, Life Coaching, Thought Leadership, Virtues and Sins

Diligence refers to hard work, work ethic, and the belief that work is good in itself. As opposed to sloth, defined as spiritual or emotional apathy.

In other words, a diligent person is someone who performs given tasks with high integrity, perhaps even mechanically, without ever questioning why he/she is doing a certain activity? Whereas a sloth is someone who couldn´t care less?

This is one of the things that have been on my mind ever since I have, again, been on the job market. I have asked myself whether being unemployed is equal with being a sloth? It cannot be that simple.

The break-out of the global financial crisis in early 2008 has affected many people´s lives around the world. Not every unemployed person is unemployed because of laziness. On the contrary – most unemployed people want to get back into work life, but how, when firms are constantly dismissing staff and not keen on investing at all. This is the situation in many countries right now, including Finland, where both private and public debt have increased, and where we now all suffer from the aftermath of over-consumption.

The markets have changed. For good. How useful is diligence in countries that are struggling with their economies? States that have outsourced the majority of production to low-wage countries in order to increase revenue (which, by the way, in the long run is probably becoming more costly for these countries´ economies).

Those who have even the slightest understanding of economics in general know how to read between the lines. They also comprehend that investors want a return for the risk they are taking when lending their surplus to diverse firms on divers markets worldwide.

The European Commission is running a strategic program named “Europe 2020 targets”. The main targets are as follows:

1. Employment

– 75% of the 20-64 year-old to be employed

2. R&D

– 3% of the EU’s GDP to be invested in R&D

3. Climate change and energy sustainability

– greenhouse gas emissions 20% (or even 30%, if the conditions are right) lower than 1990

– 20% of energy from renewable energy sources

– 20% increase in energy efficiency

4. Education

– Reducing the rates of early school-leaving below 10%

– At least 40% of 30-34–year-old completing third level education

5. Fighting poverty and social exclusion

– At least 20 million fewer people in or at risk of poverty and social exclusion

Click here to access all the Europe 2020 indicators on the Eurostat website

Features of the targets

  • They give an overall view of where the EU should be on key parameters by 2020.
  • They are translated into national targets so that each Member State can check its own progress towards these goals.
  • They do not imply burden-sharing – they are common goals, to be pursued through a mix of national and EU action.
  • They are interrelated and mutually reinforcing:
    • educational improvements help employability and reduce poverty
    • more R&D/innovation in the economy, combined with more efficient resources, makes us more competitive and creates jobs
    • investing in cleaner technologies combats climate change while creating new business/job opportunities.

According to the European Commission, Finland has progressed both in terms of CSR and fiscal consolidation. Reforms in Finland include:

– Municipal structure

– Healthcare and social services

– Extension of youth guarantee

– Reduction of access to early retirement

– National competition authority

– Temporary tax incentives to support research and investments

Great strategic reforms on paper, but how well will these be executed?

Finland´s main policy challenges include the loss in competitiveness over the course of the past decade (from surplus to deficit). Since 2008 Finland lost 23 % of its share in world exports. Finland is certainly suffering from macroeconomic imbalances.

The main challenge right now, according to the EC, is the ability to attract new investments to the Finnish economy, in order to improve both employment and productivity, and to replace declined industries with new, lucrative options. Finland has an excellent research system which should be better taken advantage of in terms of innovation in both products and services (one good example of this is Finland´s rather new export success Supercell).

The ageing population is another challenge that Finland faces. This should be addressed, according to the EC, by improving labour market participation and by ensuring sustainability of pension and healthcare systems. Restructuring the municipal (healthcare) system is part of the plan.

The EC recommends Finland briefly to:

1. Ensure sustainable public finances

2. Increase productivity and save costs in public services

3. Increase labor market participation, in general

4. Extension of working lives and tackling both youth and long-term unemployment

5. Competition in product and service markets => decreasing regulatory barriers and improving free competition on the local market in Finland

6. Innovation and productivity in the private sector

See how Finland compares with other EU Member States in key areas 2013 European Semester Documents

(Source: European Commission. Europe 2020. Quoted on March 11th 2014).

Diligence is certainly needed not only in Finland, but in whole Europe, to successfully implement the strategy.

Virtues and Sins Part III: Chastity vs. Lust

by Anne-Maria Yritys, posted in Authentic Leadership, Business Ethics, Change Management, Life Coaching, Virtues and Sins

Happy Valentine´s Day!

Originating from Valentine of Rome, a priest who was martyred about AD 496 and buried on the Via Flaminia, Valentine´s Day is being celebrated yearly on February 14th in many countries worldwide. According to the Golden Legend, Valentine wrote the first “valentine” card himself addressed to the daughter of his jailer Asterius, who was no longer blind, signing as “Your Valentine”, the night before he was executed.

In Finland we call Valentine´s Day “Ystävänpäivä” translating into “Day of Friends”, thus not having a romantic significance but instead valuing and remembering your friends. Modified tradition used in many ways – like in WWF´s Valentine´s Day campaign.

Chastity (Latin: Castitas) refers to purity, knowledge, honesty, wisdom. Noble qualities for a leader, yet so few of us manage to fulfill these during our entire lifetimes. Is it worth trying, or just simpler to allow ourselves to be human and give in to lust (Latin: Luxuria) whenever tantalized by our egos? It is rare for a human being to completely avoid temptations, with exceptions like Mother Teresa.

To err is human; to forgive, divine (Alexander Pope).

If we all just tried just a little bit harder to value what is really important in life, the world would be a much better and safer place for all of us. This probably sounds very moral and to be honest, that´s exactly what it is. Economic motivations should not dominate moral considerations.

If you have practiced yoga and meditation you are probably familiar with the chakra system. Chakras are wheels of life, master programs in our bodies forming the coordination network of our complicated mind and body system. I warmly recommend literature e.g. “Wheels of Life” (Anodea Judith, Ph.D.) which explains the chakra system in a captivating manner.

Getting familiar with the system and stabilizing one´s chakras is one of the most effective methods of increasing personal levels of consciousness, to lead a more balanced life, to reach goals and to manage change in life. Just make sure to find a good teacher and make it a life-long journey. Chakras are very powerful so it is important to practice with knowledge.

Knowing how to balance one´s chakra system is directly related to the fact of being able to balance one´s life. Many of our daily problems can be solved by stabilizing our chakras, some of which may be under- or overfunctioning. According to some chakra experts and practitioners humanity, in general, is about to shift to the heart chakra. Good news for our planet, although a majority of the world´s population still need to struggle with the very basic needs of the root chakra.

Our chakras function separately, but form together a complete network creating rootedness, harmony, activity etc. in our bodies. It is through the chakras that the energy of life is flowing into us. The chakras enable us to communicate, to sense and to understand. Information flows both ways in our chakras, with each chakra having its own responsibility.

Root chakra: Closest to the ground. Through the root chakra we are connected to a natural and innocent state of being. A well-balanced root chakra can be identified e.g. through following:

–          Calm and confident behavior

–          Ability to enjoy physical activities

–          Downright relation to nature

–          Feeling of safety

–          Ability to feel fellowship easily

–          Strong family boundaries and respect for one´s roots

–          Feeling of having deserved one´s place in the world

Sacral chakra: Above the root chakra. Center for creative inspiration, willingness to see and to experience new things and to meet new people. Also the center for sexuality. Qualities when well-balanced:

–          Vivid imagination

–          Feeling of being confident

–          Approving oneself

–          Ability to play/playfulness

–          Not looking for correlations

–          Ability to identify with others and to play roles

Solar Plexus: Center for ambition, personal will, competitiveness, autonomy and social skills. When the solar plexus is active, an individual needs to belong, to network and to achieve something. The individual is building relationships more consciously than before. Qualities when well-mastered:

–          Reliability and precision

–          Able to manage stress

–          Normal ambition

–          Mastering one´s life

–          A strong will and inspiration to live

–          Good ability to judge

–          Endurance

–          Favoring mental exercises

–          Good memory

–          Ability to build lasting relations

–          Ability to take and give constructive criticism

–          Ability to set goals

–          Ability to work both as an employee and as a leader

–          Knows how to take initiative

–          Not afraid of taking responsibility

Heart Chakra: Center for love, relationships, and for the sense of justice. Directly related to physical health and healing. Center for compassion. The more developed, the easier it gets for and individual to practice forgiveness, both towards oneself as well as towards others. Qualities when well-balanced:

–          A need to listen to and to understand others

–          Love for nature

–          Good health

–          Ability to adapt easily

–           Patience

–          Sacrifice

–          Incorruptible

–          Courage

–          Stable opinions

–          Good judge of human nature

–          Good relationships

–          Empathy

Throat Chakra: A creative, expressive and imaginative individual has a well-developed throat chakra. This chakra is also related to various paranormal abilities, such as premonitions and clairaudience, developed visualization. Qualities when well-balanced:

–          Good imagination

–          Artistic capabilities

–          Willingness to listen and to understand others

–          Vivid dreams

–          Good sense of balance

–          Ability to focus well

–          Ability to shut off excessive thoughts

–          Spirit longs for deep relations

–          Interest for spirituality

–          Good self-expression

–          Quick ability to come up with ideas and to take initiative

–          Stays calm under pressure and catastrophes

Brow Chakra (Third Eye): The experienced world expands further. Spirituality becomes an even more significant part of an individual´s life. Discovery of immense inner potential. Things that feel irrelevant and consuming are no longer of interest. Strong third eye qualities:

–          Sharp visual memory

–          All kind of efficient visuality

–          Broad view of the world

–          Exceptional selflessness

–          Healthy eyes and mind

–          Ability to remain strongly focused even under extreme pressure

–          Gift of intuition

–          Telepathic ability

–          Belief in the impossible being possible

–          Mediumistic capabilities

–          Borderless creativity

–          Headaches very uncommon

Crown Chakra: The highest energy center. For a materialistic individual it is difficult to understand that if one gives something altruistically it would ever be given back. What is coming back to you doesn´t automatically come from where it has been given, but from elsewhere, through another way, even in another form. Altruistic helping and sharing is natural for the one whose crown chakra is sparking. The individual uses, shares, and continues his/her journey without clinging onto anything understanding that nothing belongs to him/her. Despite of this he/she feels like owning the whole world because he/she owns him/herself. For some people spiritual awakening happens more easily while consciously and radically giving up their fortune. On the other hand, even large fortunes can be wisely managed and directed with a good energy system. By denying money and fortune completely, an individual also denies taking part in the worldly system. It might not be wise that all spiritually awaken people deny materialism (money). It is possible to achieve good things with money as long as it is wisely managed. Qualities of the crown chakra:

–          No fear of death

–          Many-sided vision

–          Personal worldview

–          Uncorrupted confidence

–          High level of unselfishness

–          Ability to settle with just a little possession

–          No fear for change

–          Ability to stand strong even without external support

–          Ability to forgive incomprehensible infringements

(Source: Aalto, M. 2006. Kivet kertovat. Jalokivet, chakrat ja meditaatio). 13.2.2014.

We all have the possibility to increase intuition and spirituality in our lives meaning that during our lives we may reach the highest levels of consciousness. This only requires us to be open to change, to listen to our inner voices and take the time for peace and stillness.

The better we balance ourselves and our chakras, the easier it gets to develop true leadership qualities including honesty, wisdom and knowledge sharing. Conversely to common beliefs, sharing knowledge and helping others is not harmful. Sharing knowledge is a win-win situation for everyone. In business, of course, it is useful to keep sensitive ideas to yourself, but also to practice collaboration rather than competing, and if competing, then foremost competing against oneself.

There are numerous great quotes about enemies. To borrow Buddha´s words: “It is a man´s own mind, not his enemy or foe that lures him to evil ways”. 
“Your inner strength is your outer foundation” (Allan Rufus).

Virtues and Sins Part 2: Patience vs. Wrath

by Anne-Maria Yritys, posted in Authentic Leadership, Building Dialogue, Change Management, Communication Skills, Life Coaching, Virtues and Sins

Have you ever felt impatient? Full of wrath, not knowing how to calm down or how to relax? Letting off steam in a proper manner e.g. through regular physical activities is good for anyone´s health, but if and when we do exercise wrath in maliscious ways, we end up harming not only others around us but most of all ourselves. Do you agree?

Having the gift of the tongue may be helpful in some situations, but playing a smart aleck can sometimes turn against you. Therefore, patience and the ability of listening, truly attentive listening often brings one further and enhances the birth of a true dialogue.

Then, what is a dialogue? And how is it related to patience and wrath? Simple questions, non?

A few years ago I had the privilege of attending a class held by Shawn Spano, Ph.D., about communication and dialogue at SJSU in Silicon Valley. According to Spano, there are many different approaches to dialogue. As an example, he used a unique form of human communication relating it to the social construction theory.

“Communication is the process through which we collectively create our social worlds. Rather than see communication as a neutral vehicle for transmitting information from one person to another, social construction treats communication as a primary activity, one that not only reflects meaning but shapes it as well”.

Seen from this perspective, everything comprising our social worlds (emotions, personalities, relationships, beliefs, attitudes, identities etc.) are being created in patterns of communication.

Social construction in key words:

– Individuals co-construct their social worlds through communication processes

– Communication is a process of action, not only transmission of information

– To widen the boundaries of people´s social worlds, there is a need to create communication bridges in-between these.

DIFFERENCES BETWEEN ARGUMENT AND DIALOGUE:

In Argument we…:

  • Try to win
  • Compete for speaking time
  • Speak for others
  • Create a potentially threatening and uncomfortable environment
  • Take sides with others
  • Polarize ourselves from those with whom we disagree
  • Feel unswerving commitment to a point of view
  • Ask questions to make a point or put the other person down
  • Make predictable statements
  • Make simplistic statements
  • COMPETE

In dialogue, we…:

  • Try to understand
  • Value listening
  • Speak from personal experience
  • Create an atmosphere of safety
  • Discover differences even among those with whom we agree
  • Discover shared concerns between ourselves and others
  • Discover our uncertainties as well as deeply held beliefs
  • Ask questions out of true curiosity and the desire to know more
  • Discover significant new things
  • Explore the complexity of the issues being discussed
  • COLLABORATE

(Source: http://www.publicconversations.org)

Once again: what has this got to do with patience and wrath?

Just about everything, since we all have the ability of constructing our social worlds through our means of communication. Communication and dialogue are at the core of every individual´s and organization´s success, but still, more often than not, undervalued.

Through the development of communication and dialogue we can all become successful at what we do, both in business and private.

For more information, feel free to contact me and to comment my posts. I love being in dialogue with people.

Seven Virtues and Seven Deadly Sins Part I: Charity vs. Greed

by Anne-Maria Yritys, posted in Authentic Leadership, Change Management, Life Coaching, Thought Leadership, Virtues and Sins

According to cognitive psychologist George Miller´s theory from 1956, most adults have a short-term memory capacity of five to nine items, which makes number 7 magic (plus or minus two). Perhaps this is also one of the reasons for the classical seven virtues and seven deadly sins? People, on the average, have such a restricted short term memory that virtues and sins are easily mixed up? The truth must be much more complicated than this. I doubt that any human being is capable of explaining the complexity behind humanity in one simple sentence.

What are the seven virtues and the seven deadly sins? I wanted to discuss these in depth since the establishment of my leadership blog. It´s not that I would exactly be reinventing the wheel, since these were identified and discussed already by the Greek philosophers Aristotle and Plato. Some things remain shooting stars, while others are always actual and important.

With Christmas approaching, charity and greed are probably the most relevant two to be discussed. We have yet another greedy (?) year almost behind us, whereby firms are soon about to close their books and in January, about to announce their fourth quarter results to shareholders and stakeholders. On the other hand, numerous organizations and NGO´s worldwide take action in order to collect money for various groups with one thing in common: the need of support and financial aid.

But what is greed exactly? Greed is a desire to possess, materialism of abstract value with a selfish intention, on a high level beyond the dictates of basic human needs such as shelter and food. It can also be interpreted as to having a high desire and pursuit of wealth, status, and power. Wikipedia´s explanation includes the fact that greed is “an inordinate desire to acquire or possess more than one needs”. Could it be explained more simply?

The negative aspect of greed is to deprive others of potential means, perhaps including  basic survival and comfort or future opportunities accordingly.

Charity, on the other hand, is giving alms, benevolence or generosity, being human and helping others without expecting anything in return. It is foremost helping those in need, but also helping and giving people around you (anyone), without expecting anything in return.

Unfortunately, the world is not equal, in many ways. There is nothing wrong with being successful and making money, but greediness is different. Charity is to help others with legally earned money and generated wealth. If, however, wealth has been earned in unethical ways, it is questionable how ethically and morally right it is to help others through illegal earnings.

Luckily, a large part of charity is generated through legal means.

Leadership Lessons Learned

by Anne-Maria Yritys, posted in Authentic Leadership, Building Dialogue, Communication Skills, Life Coaching, Thought Leadership

Leadership Lessons Learned

“Lighthouses don´t go running all over an island looking for boats to save; they just stand there shining.” (Anne Lamott)

Everything in life happens for a reason. It is just not always so clear what that reason is. This illegibility may be the reason why I personally often philosophize and reflect the deeper purpose of worldly issues. It is quite obvious that our planet is far from being black or white, but still I often do wonder what the purpose is of having, on one side, so much beauty and goodness, and on the other side, so much evil and darkness.

Why are some people rich, and others poor? And how should the word “rich” be defined anyway? Some people are wealthy in terms of monetary value and materialism, but does this make them happier as individuals? And how is happiness defined? What makes me happy? What makes you happy? Perhaps true happiness begins with having the right mindset, by valuing everything that you have in life, both the good and the less good experiences. By being thankful even for the hardships in life – how could we otherwise grow as individuals, develop our leadership skills and grow as spiritual beings? After all, we are souls with physical bodies. Every person we meet is our teacher.

Leadership begins with knowing oneself, in understanding and in living our personal values. Each one of us has a core personality that remains the same no matter how much we develop, learn and change throughout our lives. The power of authentic leadership comes from the recognition of your true identity and living up to it. The better you are capable of connecting with your true self, and the stronger you identify yourself with your true source of being, increases the satisfaction of everything you do.

It can sometimes be difficult to remain true to yourself in a world that is constantly trying to change you, and to influence you. Our world today is so full of stimulus – an endless ocean of possibilities – which makes it more difficult to choose where to put your effort and your energy. The oversupply of almost everything on our planet has actually led to many people worldwide having difficulties in decision-making, often starting from the simplest resolution. If you are interested in knowing more about this topic, I warmly recommend you to read “The Art of Choosing”, written by Sheena Iyengar.

Much has changed globally in the past century. We have traveled from the industrial revolution to the breakthrough and the new era of information technology. According to some research we are about to enter a new time of creativity, and who knows what our future keeps in storage for us. It is obvious that we are all partly responsible for the creation of our future. Since a few years, social media has grown to become a huge global industry, and whole new jobs are constantly being created through these changes. New job titles such as social media or network marketer, social media expert, SEO consultant and so on, are now commonplace. Recruitment is increasingly moving towards finding suitable candidates through different social media sites, but also through networks established by people on social media. Traditional media is, at least to some point, at a peak of change – from newspapers and television to online media and digital channels. Online business, the sense of having a global reach through social media, increases the sense of faster changes than ever. But is this actually the truth? Does change occur faster today than a few decades ago? Or is it just an illusion? I do not have the answer. I am personally just aware of the fact that we people tend to create our own time management systems, and we are both personally, as well as collectively, responsible for the hectic lifestyles that many of us lead today. Daily stress factors have already led to new global movements, such as Slow Food and people spending their vacations in retreats – just to practice yoga, and to meditate, in order to find some stillness and peace from the otherwise so noisy and hectic lifestyles.

But to get back to the actual topic: one of the important leadership lessons that I have personally learned is that we are all, in the end, personally responsible for the way we live. I do not think there is any actual measure for success. What is important for someone might not be important for another person. Each and one of us lead a personal life. Success should never be compared or measured with the achievements of other people, but rather for you as an individual. Focus on your personal life, and your values. Set personal goals. Don´t be afraid of going beyond your comfort zone! If you always stick to the same routine, without ever challenging yourself, you will not grow as a person. And if your life is too comfortable, you will not develop. Therefore, it is important to have goals, whatever their nature, spiritual or material.

Having a clear focus is also important, if you want to progress in life and career. This may be the number one lesson for me. I know from personal experience that despite of being a big picture thinker, ambitious, and determined, I have sometimes had thoughts about getting nowhere in life. But it is actually wrong, and realizing this has developed my patience to whole new levels. Life is actually about the journey – not just about reaching destinations. I know many stories about people who have reached whatever goals they have set themselves. Despite of this, many have a feeling of emptiness afterwards. When this happens, the destination has not been worth the journey – or, even worse, the journey itself was not enjoyed while trying so hard to reach the destination. Focus and determination can move mountains. I do believe that we can reach any goals we set ourselves, and fulfill any dreams we dare to dream. They just have to be worth the actual journey.

To end this writing, I´d like to share a small story about humanity.

“Two men, both seriously ill, occupied the same hospital room.

One man was allowed to sit up in his bed for an hour each afternoon to help drain the fluid from his lungs.

His bed was next to the room’s only window.

The other man had to spend all his time flat on his back.

The men talked for hours on end.

They spoke of their wives and families, their homes, their jobs, their involvement in the
military service, where they had been on vacation.

Every afternoon, when the man in the bed by the window could sit up, he would pass the time by
describing to his roommate all the things he could see outside the window.

The man in the other bed began to live for those one hour periods where his world would be
broadened and enlivened by all the activity and color of the world outside.

The window overlooked a park with a lovely lake. Ducks and swans played on the water while
children sailed their model boats. Young lovers walked arm in arm amidst flowers of every color
and a fine view of the city skyline could be seen in the distance.

As the man by the window described all this in exquisite details, the man on the other side of
the room would close his eyes and imagine this picturesque scene.

One warm afternoon, the man by the window described a parade passing by.

Although the other man could not hear the band – he could see it in his mind’s eye as the
gentleman by the window portrayed it with descriptive words.

Days, weeks and months passed.

One morning, the day nurse arrived to bring water for their baths only to find the lifeless body
of the man by the window, who had died peacefully in his sleep.

She was saddened and called the hospital attendants to take the body away.

As soon as it seemed appropriate, the other man asked if he could be moved next to the window.
The nurse was happy to make the switch, and after making sure he was comfortable, she left
him alone.

Slowly, painfully, he propped himself up on one elbow to take his first look at the real world
outside.

He strained to slowly turn to look out the window besides the bed.

It faced a blank wall.

The man asked the nurse what could have compelled his deceased roommate who had
described such wonderful things outside this window.

The nurse responded that the man was blind and could not even see the wall.

She said: “Perhaps he just wanted to encourage you”.

Epilogue:

There is tremendous happiness in making others happy, despite our own situations.
Shared grief is half the sorrow, but happiness when shared, is doubled. If you want to feel rich, just count all the things you have that money can’t buy.

“Today is a gift, which is why it is called The Present “.”